Well, I just spent the last hour reading lists and I'm going to share one with you...it's called Classic Movie Lines That, Without Proper Editing, Would Not Have Been So Classic. Here's one item on the list:
I made him an offer. And though it was difficult to refuse, he wanted to mull it over. You know, discuss it with his wife and whatnot. He said he'd get back to me next Tuesday.
There are others that include some colorful language so I won't reproduce them here. But if you like old movies, you'll get a kick out of it.
There are many more lists at this site by Timothy McSweeney plus other very entertaining snippets such this example of "Rock-n-Roll Thesaurusized":
By the Beatles
In the recent past, every one of my dilemmas gave the impression of being so distantly absent.
At the present, it seems as though they're at this time to hang about....
P.S. The site is connected to 826 Valencia, a non-profit organization dedicated to working with kids 8-18 with their writing skills, particularly creative writing. 826 Valencia is part of a larger 826 National Group. Sounds like a group our libraries should be working with!